Caring Over the Holidays: Why This Season Feels Harder for Family Carers

December 15, 2025

When the Holidays Don’t Feel Light or Joyful

The holiday season is often described as warm, joyful, and restorative.

But if you’re caring for someone you love, it can feel heavier, busier, and more emotionally complicated.

Many carers tell me they feel:

stretched thin by extra responsibilities
pulled between family expectations and daily care
anxious about what might happen when services are closed
guilty for wanting rest, quiet, or space
quietly sad about how different things feel from previous years

If this resonates, please know this: there is nothing wrong with you.

Caring doesn’t pause for the holidays — and the pressure often increases.

As an occupational therapist and former professional carer, I see this every year. Adult daughters, sons, and spouses often carry far more than anyone realises, especially at this time of year.

Why the Holidays Feel So Much Harder When You’re a Carer

The holiday period brings a unique combination of challenges that don’t always get talked about.

For many carers, this season includes:

changes to familiar routines
busier, more cluttered homes
unfamiliar seating and environments if you are visiting others
more people offering opinions, but less practical help
reduced access to health and social care services

Even small changes can increase fatigue, worry, and physical strain — especially when you’re already tired.

If you’re caring for a spouse, the holidays can also bring a quieter layer of grief. Noticing what’s changed, what’s missing, or what now feels difficult is a natural part of long-term love.

None of this means you’re failing.

It means you’re human — and paying close attention.

The Hidden Risks Carers Often Underestimate at This Time of Year

One of the reasons the holidays feel so stressful is that risk increases quietly, not dramatically.

It’s rarely one big thing.

More often, it’s the accumulation of:

tiredness
busier rooms
unfamiliar environment if visiting
extra clutter
colder weather
disrupted routines
pressure to “keep things going”

Many carers tell me they didn’t realise how much these small shifts mattered — until something felt suddenly harder or unsafe.

This isn’t about fear or overthinking.

It’s about awareness.

When you understand where pressure and risk tend to rise, you can make calmer decisions — without needing to do everything perfectly.

“Good Enough” Is Often the Safest Approach

The holidays can carry an unspoken expectation to keep traditions going, host others, or push through tiredness.

But in caring, simpler is often safer.

From an OT perspective, reducing complexity:

protects energy
lowers physical strain
reduces risk
supports steadier days

This might mean fewer commitments, shorter visits, or letting go of how things “used to be”.

Choosing a manageable version of the holidays isn’t giving up.

It’s thoughtful, protective care — for both of you.

When Reduced Services Add to the Worry

Another layer carers often carry quietly is concern about support access.

Over the holiday period:

services may run reduced hours
response times can be slower
familiar professionals may be unavailable

This uncertainty can sit in the background, increasing anxiety even when nothing is wrong.

Knowing in advance where to turn — and what to prioritise — can make a significant difference to how steady you feel day to day.

You don’t need all the answers.

You just need a calmer starting point.

Why I Created the “Coping Over the Holidays” Guide

I created the Coping Over the Holidays guide because many carers told me the same thing:

“I just want something calm and practical I can refer back to when I’m tired or unsure.”

The guide is designed to be:

simple and reassuring
practical without being overwhelming
something you can dip into, not read all at once
a reference you can keep close during a demanding season

It includes:

gentle preparation prompts
clear areas to focus on (without pressure)
reassurance about when to manage and when to seek help
reminders that good enough really is enough

It’s not about doing more — it’s about feeling more supported.

A Gentle Next Step (If It Would Help)

If this article has helped you feel seen or understood, you may find the Coping Over the Holidays – Free Guide useful to have beside you over the coming weeks.

You can get the Coping Over the Holidays - Free Guide here.

There’s no urgency and no expectation.

It’s simply there if you’d like something calmer to return to.

You can also explore other free OT-created guides on falls, burnout, and knowing who to ask for help, if and when that feels right.

Get the How to Spot Burnout Early and What to Do About It - Free Guide here.

Get the Who to Ask for Help - Free Guide here.

Get The First 60 Seconds After a Fall - Winter Edition - Free Guide here.

Before You Go

Caring over the holidays can feel lonely, heavy, and exhausting — even when others around you seem to be celebrating.

Please remember: